Navigating Toddler Toilet Training: Your Personalized Guide

Navigating toddler toilet training, also known as potty training, is a journey filled with excitement, challenges, and milestones. As a parent, understanding your child’s unique needs and readiness is key to successfully navigating this process. Some children are ‘trained’ from as early as 6 months of age, while some catch on from the age of 4 years old. There is no right or wrong way to this training. However, a salient point to toilet training lies in the child’s readiness.

However, according to Dr Christopher Green, in his book Toddler Taming – A Parents’ Guide to the First Four Years, there is a difference between toilet timing and toilet training. The former entails a reflex action to poop after a meal, while the latter is a deliberate action to use the toilet. In my opinion, the former usually leads to the latter. In this guide, I share my own experience with some insight into toilet training girls versus boys. Then, a comprehensive preparatory guide, as well as some research-based recommendations will be given to assist you.

My Experience

As a Montessori Educator and a parent, I learned to recognize the signs of readiness in my children for toilet training. With my daughter, signs such as staying dry for longer periods and the ability to sit steadily on the potty signaled her readiness at just 13 months old. Recognizing these cues, I transitioned her from regular strap diapers to pant diapers. However, living in a duplex with the toilets downstairs posed a logistical challenge. This prompted me to opt for a solution that prioritized convenience. Thus, I invested in a potty and kept it upstairs for easy access. When downstairs, my daughter used the toilet.

Recalling the dedicated week we committed to toilet training, akin to the time spent weaning from pacifiers, we resolved not to be deterred by accidents. Despite encountering several mishaps, particularly during the summer when our daughter went ‘diaperless’ with the potty in sight, our consistent encouragement bolstered her spirits. Each attempt she made towards the potty, even if unsuccessful, served as a learning opportunity. Witnessing her accomplishment of using the potty for a bowel movement filled us with pride, further motivating her progress. For a comprehensive guide detailing our approach, continue reading below.

Little Girls vs Little Boys

Toilet training may vary between toddlers girls and boys. While my daughter showed readiness signs earlier, my son began exhibiting signs at about 18 months. He started indicating when he needed to go with words like “poo-poo” and “pee-pee”. Similarly, he brings his diaper bag when he wants to be changed and occasionally points to his diaper. I began to ponder whether he would use a potty (sit) or a urinal (stand). While either is acceptable, sitting initially helps with aim control. Dr Green labelled aiming amiss as the ‘Fireman Syndrome’. Understanding such nuances can ease the transition for both parents and children.

A Comprehensive Preparatory Guide to Help You Navigate Toilet Training

1. Look for signs of readiness: my little girl notably stayed dry for longer periods. For you, it could be that your little one shows interest in the bathroom or indicates discomfort with dirty diapers or other. Every child is different so be on the lookout for bodily awareness cues in your toddler.
2. Invest in the right training equipment: I mentioned that we used a potty (upstairs) and a seat adapter for the regular toilet (downstairs). I also purchased pant/pull up diapers and regular underwear to get my little one excited about the process.
3. Prepare the environment: This is big in the Montessori approach. For instance, keep the potty in view of your little one.
4. Keep company: Stay close and read a book to your little one to provide support and encouragement, gradually allowing independence. I got so used to keeping my daughter company but now she’s 3 years old and tells me to excuse her and shut the door. Ouch!
5. Communicate: Talk to your toddler about the process to build understanding and confidence. Our chats improved my little girl’s vocabulary on toileting terms.
6. Brace yourself for accidents: These still happen 2 years after ‘successfully’ toilet training our toddler. Accidents are part of the learning process, so keep spare clothes handy.
7. Be consistent and patient: Consistency and patience are crucial in reinforcing new habits and routines.
8. Establish a routine: Set regular bathroom times, especially after waking up of after meals. I did not use this point on my little girl because she listened to her body quite well. However, I might have to use it for my little boy.
9. Introduce the concept before starting training: Familiarize your child with the idea of using the potty or toilet through books, videos or observing older siblings. Again, I did not do this, but I know that it worked for some.

Research-Based Recommendations

Consider resources like Dr. Christopher Green’s aforementioned book, Toddler Taming – A Parents’ Guide to the First Four Years which humorously covers toilet training, among other toddler-related topics. Additionally, watch the video below for further insights on toilet training.

Perhaps, you are keen on the Montessori approach? You can explore https://www.homeandontheway.com/blog/toilet-learning-the-montessori-way. This read emphasizes toddler readiness and environmental preparation, among others, towards toilet training. Rewards or punishments are frowned upon.

Conclusion

Every child’s journey with toilet training is unique, requiring patience, understanding, and support. Remember, there’s no silver bullet, so trust your instincts, celebrate successes, and stay resilient through challenges.

Share your experiences and insights in the comment section to support other toddler parents on this rewarding journey.

Reference

Green C. 2012. Toddler Taming – A Parents’ Guide to the First Four Years. Great Britain: Clays Limited, St Ives plc.

Haotw. 2022. Toilet Learning the Montessori way. Available at https://www.homeandontheway.com/blog/toilet-learning-the-montessori-way. Accessed on 08 April 2024.