Have you ever found yourself debating whether stay-at-home moms or working moms have the tougher job? Let’s skip the comparison, because both come with their own set of challenges and rewards. In reality, stay-at-home moms live at their workplace, without the option to clock out. It may sound overwhelming, but with the right mindset, it doesn’t have to feel like a burden. It’s important to acknowledge that not all moms are suited for either path.
Some moms thrive in the working world, while others find their place at home raising their kids. And it doesn’t have to be permanent – many moms transition between these roles based on the season of their life. A stay-at-home mom wears many hats: caretaker, teacher, nurse, cook, cleaner, playmate, and many more all rolled into one. While the workload can seem endless, there are some real advantages to staying home with your young children. That’s the focus of this piece.
My Experience as a Stay-at-Home Mom
I was a working mom before circumstances forced me to become a stay-at-home mom. After my second child was born, my husband and I decided I would temporarily stay home with the kids. We recently relocated from Africa to Europe, and with the high cost of childcare and differences in the education system, our decision made sense. Initially, it felt overwhelming being the primary/default parent. I was constantly cleaning, caring for the kids, and managing the house.
I hardly had any time for myself. While many working moms find fulfilment in their paychecks, I find mine through connecting with other stay-at-home moms. To manage the workload, I started planning and organizing my days. This includes scheduling intentional outings with my young children, which they love. Whether it’s trips to the library, walks to the playground/park, feeding ducks at the pond, or riding their scooters, these activities help break up the routine. This level of planning keeps me on track, prevents burnout, and allows me to seek help from my husband when needed.
For example, my husband started handling the bedtime routine, which gave me a much-needed break. He would brush the kids’ teeth, change diapers, read them a bedtime story, and tuck them in while I finished cleaning up the kitchen. Afterward, I could finally relax and unwind for the day. In retrospect, I appreciate how this routine not only gives me some personal time but also teaches me valuable lessons about balance and the importance of teamwork within my family.
Research Insight: The Reality of Stay-at-Home Motherhood
Being a stay-at-home mom isn’t easy. The constant responsibility overload and being the default parent are some of the main challenges (Callaghan, 2024). But beyond the hard work, there are several meaningful advantages to staying home with your kids, particularly while they are still young. Here are my personal five key advantages:
5 Advantages of Being a Stay-at-Home Mom with Young Children
- Never missing a milestone
When you’re always around, you’re always there for the special moments – those first steps, first words, first laughs. As a stay-at-home mom, you can capture and cherish these milestones in real-time. As you watch them grow, you create bonds and build lifelong memories (Educational Wave, 2024).
2. Saving on childcare costs
Childcare can be expensive (Educational Wave, 2024). By staying home, you can save on these costs while being directly involved in your children’s early development. In many European countries, primary school is free, which can ease the financial burden as your kids grow older and you may decide to return to work.
3. Opportunities for paid work
Thanks to remote work and the rise of online opportunities, stay-at-home moms can earn an income without sacrificing time with their kids. Whether it’s freelancing, starting a small business, or working part-time from home, stay-at-home moms can create a flexible work schedule that allows family-career balance.
4. Prioritizing self-care
One of the perks of being at home is the ability to carve out time for yourself. You can set your schedule to prioritize self-care in ways that work for you without societal pressures (Callaghan, 2024). By taking care of yourself, you become a better mom and partner.
5. Getting help
Being a stay-at-home mom attracts help, so it doesn’t mean you have to do everything on your own. Get help from your spouse, family members, friends, or even hired help when needed. Sharing the workload can make a huge difference. The goal is to avoid burnout and ensure you’re able to give your best to your family.
Conclusion
Finding a rhythm that works for you as a stay-at-home mom is essential. The choice to be a stay-at-home mom can be driven by personal decisions or circumstances beyond your control. It’s natural to feel overwhelmed, especially when you’re the default parent. However, there are plenty of rewards that come with the role – from never missing a milestone to having the flexibility to earn an income and prioritize your well-being. At the end of the day, stay-at-home motherhood, while demanding, also has its wins.
Action Point
Are you a stay-at-home mom or dad, or a working parent? Would you ever consider changing/switching your current position for the other? Let’s continue the conversation!
Reference
Callaghan, H. 2024. Stay-at-home mums and dads – the challenges and the wins. Accessed on 22 August 2024. Available at: https://www.irishexaminer.com/lifestyle/parenting/arid-41345381.html#:~:text=%E2%80%9CWhat%20I%20struggle%20with%20most,that’s%20what%20challenges%20me%20most.%E2%80%9D
Educational Wave. 2024. 20 Pros and Cons of being a Stay at home mom. Accessed on: 23 August 2024. Available at: https://www.educationalwave.com/pros-and-cons-of-being-a-stay-at-home-mom/